2012-06-05-bm

The Horror Pool

2012-06-05-bm

I have no idea if this comic has external relevance, but it has some personal experiential validity at least. I remember spending literally hours as a kid swimming underwater and thinking about haunting things: What it would Look Like in Atlantis, How Similar is this to Flying, etc etc. There was this terrifying altered state associated with the pool: your basic systems of movement are overloaded; your whole way of interacting with the world changes utterly, into something more eerily natural. I guess that’s what I’m trying to capture, that way swimming TAKES OVER THE BRAINS OF CHILDREN, and I think it kind of does a good job of it, but I just seriously have no idea if other people have this creepy hypnotic relationship to swimming, of if it is just me and Betty Spector, a character I have created. Please weigh in on the subject with your own terrifying water stories!

Also, question: how old does Betty look/seem? I have like zero experience with drawing kids, other than the somewhat older kids in The Man Who Hates Fun, and I may need to figure out some alternate way to do this.

Okay, sad news: there will be NO COMIC THURSDAY OR SATURDAY. It can not happen! I am sorry! If you wish to send me something to put up in lieu of a comic on those days, totally feel free to do so and everyone can party in my house while I’m not here, all right? But OTHERWISE, please join us next TUESDAY for a Quiet Dinner Conversation with Mona and Inez, followed WEDNESDAY by some Existential Girls Action.

2012-06-02-bm

Who is the Worst Girlfriend

2012-06-02-bm

It’s seriously bad at the copy store when an old dude needs a million weird receipts copied. It is such a painstaking process!

As far as what song from “The Wall” is playing at maximum volume throughout the strip: which song would be the funniest? PLEASE CAST YR VOTE IN THE COMMENTS DEAR READERS.

I will see you all Tuesday, when we take a mysterious journey into the underwater deeps with our intrepid heroines.

(Note: this strip also appears in the new issue of ROCKSALT, which has JUST DROPPED. Find a copy around Austin, or read it online here! (Here’s the rudimentary official website for back issues: http://fictioncircus.com/rocksalt.) I also did the dialogue for John David Brown‘s excellent comic strip Stillbourne in this one.)

2012-05-31-bm

Doctor Christ-X and the Corrections

2012-05-31-bm

I want to go on record that this is the first appearance of William Gaddis’s US National Book Award winning novel, JR, to appear in any comic strip ever. I feel confident in making this assertion.

It’s possible that this is also the first time the works of Jonathan Franzen have been discussed with any degree of seriousness (um, in this case an extremely low degree of seriousness) in any comic strip ever. Perhaps this is funnier if you’ve read the Corrections? Okay, how many people have read The Corrections, or any book by Jonathan Franzen? WHAT DID YOU THINK?

I’ll start: The Corrections seems, despite its flaws, to be actually impelled by some kind of serious individual pain, and by the kind of moral questioning where you don’t know the answer in advance. Sure, evil drug companies have stolen the patent of a noble working man to disseminate a kind of evil brain drug to the masses, and sure, video games corrupt EVEN NARNIA, but there’s a sense that these are perhaps the best possible roads, and that the characters the book kind of forces us to identify with are really just Luddite scum for resisting the technological corruption of man in the name of happiness. You could make a pretty good case for both sides and the book is ambivalent in the best sense. Contrast with Freedom, which I hell of don’t like: Freedom’s moral dilemmas just sort of exist in a void. The answer to the question of whether mountaintop removal mining to save a single bird species is justified doesn’t seem that interesting to Franzen anymore: the large moral questions loom in the background, but essentially as flavor for the domestic drama, horrible wunderkammer set dressing: kid gets in big trouble selling bad Russian tank parts to US Blackwater-style contractors (that may be wrong; I don’t have the book on me, but something like that); husband faces pressure at work because mountain families refuse to move so that their land can be destructively mined; gentrification divides two families, etc. Think of it in TV Guide synopsis format: “An Occupy Wall Street protest forces Rick and Cindy to reassess their marriage,” “A bad investment in a Far Eastern iPhone sweatshop causes Michael to lose millions, creating tensions with his wife.” Whereas w/ The Corrections: “Incredibly unethical ecstasy-like drug allows Midwestern mom to cope with horribly dissolving marriage” — the social horror is more directly, satisfyingly tied to the situation.

(I also sort of remember writing this a few years ago: http://fictioncircus.com/news.php?id=46&mode=one. It’s a review of Franzen’s STRONG MOTION, whose plot I almost don’t even remember anymore. I think an evil corporation is generating earthquakes? I remember a really good scene with a raccoon living in horrible urban blight. But I stand by pretty much all of that review except the quality of the writing.)

Further: there’s a dejected quality to Freedom, whereas The Corrections had some kind of terrible sense of hope and possibility, like Kobo Abe-level terrible. I just don’t like Freedom. Who likes Freedom, or has any kind of thought about Franzen whatsoever, I guess?

Okay, so on Saturday we get to see where Inez works, plus also a desperate confrontation between Old and Young. Enjoy it!

2012-05-29-bm

Seitan’s Hoof

2012-05-29-bm

I don’t know what to say about this one? It was tricky to write it so that Mona doesn’t come off as completely awful, just entertainingly awful. I have no idea what any of the food in that buffet is supposed to be, also. Surely it can’t all be differently molded/constituted varieties of seitan.

No Existential Girls strip this week — INSTEAD PLEASE SEE MY NEAT GUEST STRIP AT BLASTER NATION. Blaster Nation is one of these newfangled comics that grew on me really, really fast — the writing is kind of great, at once funny and sounding weird despairing depths, nerdy without being entirely dependent on references. It charms me and you ought to sample the work of Brad and Leslie!

Okay okay, so please join us on Thursday, when you shall be commanded to enjoy a quiet discussion on contemporary fiction between Mona and Inez. It’ll be great!

2012-05-26-bm

Meat Murderess

2012-05-26-bm

Introducing our FOURTH and for a little while FINAL major character: INEZ, Mona’s girlfriend. Presumably she is long-suffering!

Enjoy the slow increase in summer temperatures in your region! And please return on Tuesday, when we once again deal with weird food.

2012-05-22-bm

Grass, Greener

2012-05-22-bm

The trick with writing Mona is to make her unpleasant, but not unaware of the ways in which she’s unpleasant. Also, IMPORTANT INFO is given.

Despite that, let me CHANGE TOPICS: so, how many of you reading this have read Cerebus, by Dave Sim and Gerhard? How many of you have OPINIONS about it? I would love to hear them, below. I just today picked up and read a copy of Flight, the first part of Mothers and Daughters, which is the Cerebus storyline where Dave Sim starts to go off the deep end into notions of God and Gender in the minds of pretty much everyone, a trajectory that, from all the times I’ve flipped through the last Cerebus volume at the store over the years, leads inexorably to weird stuff like Cerebus’s gay half-aardvark son cloning anthropomorphic beasts in Egypt as some kind of evil scheme by liberal/feminist politicians while Cerebus writes Torah commentaries, or God knows what. It will be exciting to watch this happen, but for now, Flight!

What starts as kind of a straightforward story of rebellion against a sinister matriarchal dictatorship quickly turns into an orgy of continuity that, having skipped the earlier Cerebus storyline Church & State, I have pretty much no context for. This wasn’t a problem with either Jaka’s Story or Melmoth, the Cerebus volumes that to me justify the effort to slog through the whole 6,000 page thing, but there are pages in here that literally make no sense, unless you’ve read all of the earlier barbarian stuff and have an in-depth working knowledge of the politics of the Eastern vs. Western Iestian church. Which is maybe not wrong, since the whole thing is supposed to be a single 6,000 page graphic novel; it’s just frustrating to come in this late in the game. Doubly frustrating is that the continuity elements I do know about — Elrod, the various Roach characters — take up a large part of the page count here, and haven’t significantly advanced in complexity since the early issues, where they were just parodies of, say, Batman or obscure sword-and-sorcery protagonists. AND I HATED THEM THEN AND I HATE THEM NOW, and it’s terrible that we still have to deal with page after page of the “Punisheroach” trying to repress his LUSTFUL THOUGHTS in densely lettered thought bubbles while there’s in theory this complicated political movement going on that almost entirely fails to be rendered or detailed on the page.

When we’re not dealing with continuity issues that are alternately completely oppressive or completely underwhelming, we’ve got Cerebus, who after some good opening pages ends up wandering into an incredibly dense MENTAL VOYAGE involving different aspects of the gnomic character Po, who literally plays a giant game of chess with the title character for something like a hundred pages of densely typeset speculation about The Nature of Reformers, the nature of “up” versus “forward,” “illusion” versus “reality,” etc etc ETC.

Conclusion about Cerebus as I’ve read it to date (basically everything to this point but Church and State, plus a couple of odd issues about Cerebus and Jaka traveling that I picked up in high school or somesuch): It’s a holy mess! But it’s an eerily compelling mess, and it occurs to me that I have a special weakness for narratives of great breadth at the expense of depth: horrible totalizing projects like the Oz books, the Ultima games, this stupid five-party samurai epic about Musashi Miyamoto I’m currently mired in watching, Love and Rockets, In Search of Lost Time, etc. There’s something about a Grand Canvas that really works for me, and part of the fun is always watching ambition fall short, and in what specific ways it falls short, and how the nature of the project almost demands that it fall short. Proust is really the only one that kind of gets it right, and he had to lock himself in an attic for twelve years and mostly write about his own life in order to do so, and it’s still oppressive to spend something like 200 pages of The Guermantes Way describing ONE PARTY AND EVERY GUEST AT IT. But there are really great parts of Swann’s Way and there are really great parts of Cerebus, and could those parts have existed without the rest of the glorious primordial mess from which they emerged? It makes me sad that more people don’t attempt things like this, accepting that more than half of it is going to be kindling that supports the parts you care about. It is a great act of asceticism to spend more than a quarter century on something as demented as Cerebus in order to produce Jaka’s Story some of the time.

I don’t want to end up like Dave Sim, contemplating the meaning of these ridiculous Cerebus stories, so I am hoping that at least some of you, the Readers, have read this stuff, or at least have strong opinions about Dave Sim or something? LET’S TALK CEREBUS ON THIS POST. (Or about the comic, if you like!)

THAT SAID, tune in tomorrow for another adventure of RHODABELLE LETT, and Thursday when we contemplate the mysterious MONSTRO BALLROOM, and the majesty of human creation through the lens of our humble character Cathy.

2012-05-19-bm

What Is The Law?

2012-05-19-bm

The central task of parenting is to ensure the transmission of values from previous generations to subsequent ones.

Here, also, we introduce a new character: CATHY, staid coffee shop coworker of young MONA SPECTOR, BAD MOTHER. These strips are going up kind of out of order of my drawing them — this is the second Bad Mother strip ever drawn, back in like 2011 — and in it, I draw Cathy’s face no less than FOUR DISTINCT WAYS. Which will I settle on?? Watch and find out here this coming TUESDAY, when Cathy will face a BRUTAL ATTACK.

Friends! Are you in San Antonio, TX, or anywhere within a two hundred mile radius of it? COME HANG OUT WITH ME AND OTHER PALS at the book launch of J.R. Helton’s Drugs, at the Twig Book Shop in San Antonio at 5 p.m. TODAY, SATURDAY MAY 19. The book formally launches on May 22, so now’s your chance to get it, unless you’re one of these scumbag e-reader types, in which case sure, go ahead and order it from Amazon. That’s cool. Why don’t you go spit on a bookstore worker while you’re at it, on your way from going to the local library and blacking out random words in the new arrivals with a Sharpie?

I’m joking, of course! Because I also have a book coming out soon, and I’m intimidated into silence by Amazon just like everyone else is.

HAPPY SATURDAY

2012-05-15-bm

Gay Chemicals, Collard Greens

2012-05-15-bm

Mona Spector, Bad Mother, encounters A MASHER.

For Austin people: the coffee place where Mona works has a layout based on vague memories of Mojo’s Daily Grind with the Epoch porch kind of brute force grafted onto the side of it. I’ve spent easily ten thousand hours at Epoch working on comics and writing and stuff, so it makes sense to have a prominent setting be used in such a way. Other memorable cannibalizations of Epoch: here, although I hate everything about that drawing now.

Join us again on THURSDAY, when Mona’s daughter Betty plays A DANGEROUS GAME.