Well readers I am in a blue funk today. I met my distinctly EX wife Linda Junior today for our usual breakfast. Before I go much further I ought to explain a little bit of the situation with Linda so that you have some of the “context” you need in order to really understand me and “where I’m coming from”. At a very desperate time in my life Linda and I found one another and decided to become one flesh under G-d which no man might tear asunder, and the years of our marriage were I don’t mind saying blessed. Linda is a sweet soul who thought nothing of moving to new towns when I had run afoul of circumstances in former towns and who was always very supportive of my plans to one day start a web comic as a means of “getting my foot in the door” of the entertainment super-industry and becoming the figure of power and influence that I have known since my earliest days that I was truly destined to be.
But… well… let’s just say that even the sweetest fruit can go sour if it is not treated well, and sometimes love just wears out, or maybe it is more accurate to say “becomes unattractive” and there is just no point in going on. I will not go into the painful details of our parting but let’s just say the court had to be involved in order to make an equitable division of assets, and thanks to the credit I was able to advance at various financial institutions I was able to hire a smart lawyer who saw the real truth in the situation of our marriage, namely that I was the “creative brain” and she was the “laboring brawn” that enabled my creative brain to ferment and reach the heights it was destined to reach. Long story short, my lawyer was able to convince a court of law that due to this division of labor in our marriage there was no sense in “messing up a good thing”, and the court made the Solomon-like decision that it would be better if I received an alimony payment on Lindas wages for the next decade at least before reassessment, as she was the “breadwinner” and I the one more deserving of support. In fairness I should say that Linda also saw the logic of this judgment, or possibly she was still suffering under the delusion that if she “did everything right” she would one day be able to get back together with me (though Fat Chance of that!), and so she did not contest the decision and signed the paperwork legally obligating her to compensate me each month for the emotional pain I suffered in our marriage. It is this “grubstake” that I used through careful saving and investment to build some of my previous business ventures, and it is this grubstake that I depend on to produce in peace this webcomic, the culmination of my creative labors in the entertainment industry since time started.
Thus you can understand dear readers my COMPLETE ANGER at learning over what ought to have been a pleasant breakfast, during which she nods and smiles while I explain to her my conceptions about Milgram and Ultra and Tuskegee and how I see them fitting into the American Dream, that she would be UNABLE TO GIVE ME HER ALIMONY CHECK ON TIME because of some flimsy excuse. She even tried to make the argument that the financial assistance she gave me earlier in the month to pay the electricity bill should somehow “count” for her alimony payment this month! The hypocrisy and folly of this “thinking” if it is worthy of that lofty name dear readers should be evident to any rational person. You would not if someone attempted to sell you shares in a steel company accept shares in an iron company in their stead. You would not if someone attempted to sell you a pig accept a cow in their stead. You would accept both but one does not substitute for the other. It is evident to everyone.
I am full of FURY and RIGHTEOUS RAGE and I had better go to bed and work out what to do dear readers and friends. I do not want to ask you to support me twice in one month but if you would like to send me checks for sums greater than $50 (otherwise the Western Union store will take too much in service fees out of the check for it to be worth my time to walk down to the strip mall and make the exchange) you can scroll back a few weeks to see my instructions for contacting me.
God Bless You.
Steve Junior