THIS GARBAGE PERSON DOES NOT UNDERSTAND MY WORK:
GO TO FOUR MINUTES TO SEE WHY I AM SUING THIS “MAN” FOR LIBEL.
GREG FIMFLAM IF YOU COME TO HAYTI, MISSOURI, I WILL FIGHT YOU. BARE CHESTED, I WILL FIGHT YOU.
May The Laugh Be With All My Faithful Readers And Followers And Fellow-Travelers In This World EXCEPT FOR GREG FIM”GLAM” YOU ARE DEAD TO ME AND ALL MY FRIENDS. FOREVER. I HATE YOU.
Steve Junior
Cartoonist and
Oh no! I’m sorry, Steve Junior! I hope you can forgive me. Maybe my analysis was too harsh. You see, I too am an artist and I know your pain. Well, not YOUR pain, exactly, but I know of a pain which affects one or more artists. For you see, I am artist bound to My Little Pony, just as Prometheus was bound to a stone. Ponies are my stone.
Or maybe ponies are my chain. That would make more sense, since it keeps me attached to the stone. The stone is my fans, I guess. It’s not a bad stone, really. In fact, it’s a pretty good stone. I’d just like to be in an open relationship with the stone and maybe see other geological structures sometimes. It’s just that the pony stone is a very large stone and I can’t seem to take it with me a lot of places – it doesn’t transport super well.
I mean, if you look at this video, it will probably get about 3,000 views or so, and statistically most viewers will only watch for about six minutes. That’s like if you had a stone that weighed 100,000 pounds and tried to move it with a video about webcomics, but the stone only moved about 3% of the distance you wanted.
I don’t know. It’s all kind of abstract really. Maybe I should think of it as the type of stone you’d build a house on, in which case it makes sense that you couldn’t just expand on the house by dragging a bunch of smaller stones to your house because you’d develop a problem with sheer stress. See, that has a much better connotation when it comes to putting demographics to a metaphor. Anyway, this is an apology.
Acceptance of your apology is a logical impossibility. I am an ARTIST, and you are a critic. Have you ever thought of being critical of YOURSELF? HAVE YOU EVER CRITICIZED YOUR OWN SHOW?
I have and I will and I will tell you. FIRST, your little “show” isn’t even on TV. How is it supposed to be real if it isn’t on TV? It isn’t. You’re lucky I “get” a youtube here in Missouri, or I would not even GRACE you with a REPLY.
SECOND, there are NO “repeating” strips in the Stanford Webcomics Experiment! EACH STRIP IS AN INDIVIDUALLY-CRAFTED HUMOR BULLET deserving of your RESPECT because I am a CRAFTSMAN and I made this comic with MY OWN BARE HANDS.
My ex-wife rewound and fast-forwaredd your little video for me many times and I have discovered all relevant sections to have been between 4 minutes and 8 minutes. YOU WILL BE SUED FOR LIBEL.
Second, YOU ARE A MEDIA TERRORIST and I AM AN AMERICAN.
Second, I am a CREATOR and an ARTIST and I do the work of LORD JESUS in making people SMILE and I could not make people smile more than I do! It is PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE unless you want me to DRIVE TO THE HOMES OF EVERY ONE OF MY (many) FANS and GRAB HTE CORNERS OF THEIR MOUTHS and PULL THEM UP IN A SMILE.
I AM A GOOD PERSON.
Yours NOT truly,
STEVE JUNIOR CARTOONIST