Moon Gold Rush!
The recent announcement that NASA has discovered massive gold, mineral, and water deposits on the moon has created an uproar in the "private spaceflight" sector.

Eccentric German multi-billionaire Genevieve Verkaufer has declared that she will begin development for a mission to the moon in order to begin mining these resources, hoping to have a private installation in place as early as 2015.

"It would be incredibly negligent to ignore the valuable resources dangling above us, considering the current energy crisis," said Willy Lomax, a spokesman for Verkaufer's consortium, the Brementown Group. "The moon does not belong to America just because it has an American flag on it."

The new findings come as a result of last year's controversial "LCROSS" moon mission. Results from the The Lunar Crater Observer and Sensing Satellite, also known as the "Bigshot," were published yesterday in the journal "Science."

Seeking answers to questions about the moon's surface, NASA fired a booster rocket at the moon and then analyzed the plume of minerals in the resulting explosion.

Verkaufer's Brementown Group hopes to be able to mine not only gold, but also silver and mercury from the moon. Some speculate that Verkaufer will use a lunar base in order to continue to expand her media empire, an empire which already includes the publishing company Bertelsmann, in addition to Frito-Lay, Exxon-Mobile, and MTV.

Other "private spaceflight" organizations have also expressed interest in moon mining, but none are as well organized as the Brementown Group.

"2015 is a bit ambitious, even for the Germans," said Sir Richard Branson, chairman of Virgin Galactic.

Verkaufer made national headlines in Germany last year when a sex tape surfaced featuring the multibillionaire media empress and one of her employees, a mentally disabled janitor at one of her newspapers. Verkaufer was acquitted of all charges of sexual improriety after courts established the janitor's consent.

"I think we could all tell from the tape that he rather enjoyed himself," said Verkaufer.

Posted by miracle on Fri, 22 Oct 2010 16:24:02 -0500 -- permanent link

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